Cat’s Eye (1985)

Episode 259, 2 Guys and a Chainsaw Horror Movie Review Podcast

Todd: Hello and welcome to another episode of Two Guys and a Chainsaw. I’m Todd.

Craig: And I’m Craig.

Todd: This week we decided to dip back into anthology territory. We haven’t done a good anthology in a while, I think since we did the month of anthologies a while back. Right. 

Craig: I don’t know. But when you suggested this movie ISI would’ve put a hundred dollars down that we had already done it.

Oh, yeah. I, I thought for sure we had already done it. 

Todd: I had thought about it. I, I’m surprised we haven’t, it, it comes to my mind every time we talk about doing anthologies. ’cause this is an anthology. I remember very distinctly watching as a young kid. And, uh, what we’re talking about is Kat’s Eye from 1985 with a screenplay written by Stephen King.

It’s an anthology of three stories. The first two stories are based on actual stories from his night shift collection, which by the way. I wore out. I loved that book. I had a paperback of that. Oh, it’s so good. And I, I probably read every story in there three or four times. I loved it. Yeah. And a and a, a third original one, uh, that was written specifically for this movie, and specifically I believe, to feature Drew Barrymore, so, mm-hmm.

Yeah, I had great memories from watching this. It was fun to watch it again because all these things kind of came back to me. They made deep impressions on me as a kid, you know, just imagery here and, and thematic material there. But I think it was Stephen King’s first PG 13 rated movie, and so, mm-hmm. I guess it makes sense.

I could have watched as a kid, there’s nothing in here that’s really so. Terrible that I shouldn’t have seen. I think I was pretty young. 

Craig: No. Yeah. How about you? Yeah, it’s pretty tame me. I don’t remember. I mean, I think I must have seen this when I was a kid, but, and I’ll probably repeat this several times throughout the episode.

I remember the third story so well. Yeah. And the other two stories. Not so much. I mean, when I, when I was looking at it and when I was looking it up and researching it and when I started watching it and stuff, I’m like, oh yes, I remember these and I remember exactly what happens. Mm. But they’re not particularly memorable to me.

Right. Like they’re fine, whatever. But the third one, so memorable, I just absolutely loved when I was a kid and I would get so excited I, this isn’t one that we had on VHS, so if I would happen to catch it on. Cable or whatever. I would be so excited. ’cause I loved it. I loved the one so much. 

Todd: I think that’s third one’s the best.

They really kind of, I can’t say they really ramp up. I can just say that the third one’s the best for me. 

Craig: It’s the best for the movie. I don’t remember reading the first story. I don’t think. No, I did. I read them both. Quitters Inc. And The Ledge. I read them both several times ’cause they were in that. I feel like both of those, they’re fine and the actors in them are good in this and we’ll of course get more specific about that in a second.

They’re fine. I just felt like those stories were better on the page, like Right. They were, I don’t know. For some reason they were more suspenseful and, and because there’s not a lot going on. Yeah. You know, it’s not a lot to see and look at. Yeah. I liked them better on the page. They’re fine here. 

Todd: The movie, meh.

The movie has to do a lot to stretch out visuals. You know, I especially think of Quitters Inc. Because there’s that whole sequence where he’s kind of going crazy where he is seeing cigarette stuff everywhere and he’s kind of having these visions at this party and like that I don’t think really was. On the page.

I think that that was almost fabricated specifically to give us something visual to see for the movie. Yeah. This is directed by Louis Teague. Uh, Louis Teague had just directed Cujo a couple years before this. Mm-hmm. And then this same year that Cat’s Eye came out, also the jewel of the Nile. Did you ever watch that?

God, we’d love that as kids. I 

Craig: loved that movie when I was a kid, and it’s not easy to find these days. Well, I, I haven’t, I haven’t given in and paid for it yet, so I haven’t seen it in a long time. But yeah, we loved it. I loved it when I was a kid too. 

Todd: We watched that all the time and, and that song, that Billy Ocean song when the Go and Gets Tough.

Yeah, it’s a great song. God, we sang that all the time, yo, but. If you go back and watch it. Seriously, not good Romance. Romancing the stone still holds up. You know the one before it, but Jewel, the Nile? No, not good. And we did another one. So we did Cujo also by this director. We did alligator too. He directed Alligator in 1980.

Craig: Oh, I liked alligator. That was a lot of fun. Yeah. 

Todd: So great director, and then Stephen King wrote the entire screenplay for this. This might be one of his better written by Stephen King movies. I would say. 

Craig: It’s good. I like it. Mm-hmm. 

Todd: It’s tons of stars in here. Oh my god. Yeah. Big. Everyone’s a star. And Alan Sylvestri did the music for it.

And it’s all kind of Cynthia and I actually wasn’t blown away by the music, to be honest, but Alan Sylvestri himself is a very distinguished, he’s a, I mean, back to the future he Back to the 

Craig: future. Yeah. Oh, oh God. The 

Todd: witches like a million things, like every movie you’ve ever loved. Pretty much from this era on.

He did the music for, there’s so many, so many things. 

Craig: Yeah. I didn’t, I didn’t love the synth score either, but I thought that it was fitting, like Yeah, for for the time and for the feel of the movie. I thought that it was. Fitting it, it, you know, it, it’s no Back to the Future. But no, it’s, I mean, it’s pretty prominently featured.

Like it’s, especially towards the end of each story. It’s pretty prominently featured to like, tell you like, this is the end. Right?

Oh, man, I didn’t, I didn’t hate it, but. It, it is very synthy and, uh, whatever. It’s a thing. It’s a bit on the 

Todd: nose. It’s a bit on the nose, you know, I don’t know what to say. It calls, yeah, it calls attention to itself, which a score really probably shouldn’t do too often. 

Craig: As, as far, as far as the plot is concerned.

I thought of you immediately when it started, because it starts. By following this beautiful cat, and I know that you’re a cat person, Uhhuh. I love cats. And I was, I was like, oh my God. That is a gorgeous cat. It is though, isn’t it? 

Todd: It is 

Craig: a, 

Todd: it is. It is a beautiful cat. It’s not only a gorgeous cat. This is a well trained cat.

It’s, he’s a good actor. Oh my God. I, I have to imagine. That the, the most difficult part of this whole movie was getting all these amazing cat shots. This cat is fantastic. It, it’s running around, it’s going in places, it’s jumping over things. It’s acting, I mean, whatever they did to, I, I was hoping and praying that there would be something in the trivia that would tell me more about this damn cat.

Mm-hmm. And or his handler. Or her handler and nothing. Nothing at all. 

Craig: Well, I, I’m sure you read the thing about how they did the shocking scene, which Yeah. Which is disturbing. But that’s the only thing that I read about it too. But it is a beautiful cat, and I was, I’m, I’m just reminded because Alan and I used to have cats, and we loved our cats and it was great because we were in college and we lived in apartments.

We didn’t have a lot of space. Loved them, loved them, loved them. And then we switched to dogs and we’ve been dog people ever since. I love cats. I think they’re amazing. I think they’re super smart. They are super independent and can pretty much take care of themselves. I just can’t handle litter boxes. Oh, okay.

Gotcha. I hate them. I hate litter boxes. Disgusting. Well, and then, and you can’t, and you can’t have cats and dogs because dogs love litter boxes and they’ll, it’s like a Chinese buffet for them. Oh. Like, they’re super excited. Don’t tell me that. Ah, I know it’s gross. And I know you can, you can cut that. You can cut that.

Todd: No, 

Craig: we’re gonna keep 

Todd: it. 

Craig: I think this is the second time you brought that up. Actually. We’re gonna keep it in both 

Todd: circumstances. 

Craig: So gross. But I love cats. They’re gorgeous. But this movie, the through line is this cat and I don’t remember where it starts. I wanna say New York. It, it travels all over New England.

Oh God. This movie, this cat gets around. Yeah, it gets around the opening scene, like it’s just running around and, and the camera’s following it and like it gets chased by Cujo. It 

Todd: does 

Craig: almost hit by Christine. I mean, yeah, like the car from Christine with a bumper sticker that literally says something like, watch out for me.

I am evil. I’m Christine. Like, I know why. Come on. I dunno. I like it. I should just slip that joke in without the 

Todd: bumper sticker calling it out. Ugh. 

Craig: God. Oh, I think it’s so, I love them. It’s cheesy and there are, so there are tons of these little nods to Stephen King at, at some point somebody’s watching the movie The Dead Zone.

At some point somebody’s reading. Pet. Cemetery. Cemetery. Like I think it’s funny. It’s funny. I liked it. I thought it 

Todd: was funny. I just thought, come on, give us some credit. Will you On the bumper sticker? 

Craig: True. Yeah. It was a little much. 

Todd: Well, the cat runs around and goes all over the place, gets chased by Cujo, almost hit by Christine.

Then it jumps onto a truck that is shipping tobacco somewhere, and then when it jumps out, it’s in the middle of New York City. And so it kind of goes from the suburbs to New York City, I’d say. Yeah, and I read that. There was originally some scenes that explained the motivations of the cat. 

Clip: I 

Todd: know I read that too, and I can’t imagine like, what, 

Clip: how would that have been?

How are you gonna get 

Craig: like, oh, are we gonna get like the cat’s backstory? Like, I don’t get it. I think it was wise to leave it out and I also didn’t think like. It was so obvious to me that the cat was just the through line. Yeah. And that it was, and that it was going somewhere because after it gets off that truck, a mannequin.

That has Drew Barrymore’s face, 

Todd: ghost Drew Barrymore. 

Clip: Help me.

You gotta find it after me. 

Craig: And, and, and Drew Barrymore just keeps popping up. Like, it’s so weird everywhere in this movie, but it’s so weird. I didn’t find it odd at all. I actually, oh. It’s fine, but with these kind of anthology movies, sometimes there’s no through line at all. Mm. Sometimes it’s just, well, now we’re moving from this story to this story, like creep show or whatever.

Yeah, you’re right. I, I kinda, I kinda like that there’s a. Through line in this, 

Todd: uh, there, yeah, the better ones definitely have through lines. Of course creep show, the through line is kind of, its pages of a comic book. It’s really simple, but there is kind of a through line. There’s a, there’s a framing story.

I like that this has the cat as the through line, but it’s funny that the through line is not just the cat, it’s also Drew Barrymore. 

Craig: I know it’s weird. 

Todd: Like the cat just looks, how 

Craig: does this ghost, right. Who is Drew Barrymore and why is she every girl and she’s calling to him like, first of all, she’s multiple characters throughout.

Yes. The movie. And when we finally get to her, it’s not like she’s been psychically calling to this cat. Like she doesn’t know anything about it either. Yeah. It’s just the essence of Drew Barrymore needs to get this cat. To a particular Drew Barrymore to take care of her. 

Todd: She was cast because the director really liked her in Firestarter, which was just a year before this.

Craig: I’ve never seen Firestarter Have you? 

Todd: I have. I saw it when I was a kid. It really freaked me out and then I read the book and it was good. I was okay. I haven’t read it either. It’s fine. It’s a pretty simple book for Stephen King book. It freaked me out as a kid because it’s basically these, uh, this kid and her father, I think, who both have the psychic power that they can start fires and the government’s pursuing them and they’ve gotta, you know.

Get away from that. Yeah, 

Craig: yeah, I get it. She’s a fire starter. I get it. I am the fire starter. Stop.

Yeah. Okay. Alright. So the mannequin talks to the cat and it’s like, help me. Okay. And then we get the first story and it’s James Wood and he’s going to like a smoking cessation. Facility, like he wants to stop smoking or whatever. Yeah. Quitters Inc. Is it wood or woods? I can’t remember. Woods. James Woods?

Yeah. Mm-hmm. My sister moved to LA right out of college and she was auditioning for shows and stuff and he had a show and she auditioned for his show and I had always heard that he was a dirtbag and like he just seems like a dirt bag. Oh yeah. But she said that she. Auditioned for him, and in fact, he is a dirt actor.

Oh, really? What you’re gonna say? Yeah. He’s actually really nice. Oh man. No, no, no. He’s actually not like, you know, my sister, she’s like five. Seven or something. Yeah, she’s a little tiny person and she’s like, James Woods was only interested in like the tall, skinny blondes with big boobs and those were like the only people that he would see.

However, she said that his co-star, I don’t even know what the show was, but I’m pretty sure his co-star was Andy Richter and she said he was lovely. Of course I wouldn’t expect anything less from Andy Richter. Uh, but anyway, so he goes to this, uh, smoking cessation place and the guy who. Is, I don’t know the boss there.

I don’t know anything about this guy. I looked up his name. His name is Alan King. Mm-hmm. And I really don’t know anything about him except for that I a hundred percent know who he is. Like I’ve seen him in a bazillion things. Mm-hmm. And he’s kind of a, not old Hollywood, but older Hollywood than us, but he was, yeah.

I feel like he was 

Todd: in everything for a minute. He really was. He always played a heavy, he often played kind of a heavy guy, sometimes a father, that type of thing. I think more or less after this, like he was in bonfire the vanities and God. Yeah. Now that I’m looking rush hour two, it’s funny. That now. Now I know because you just recognize it.

Look at it doesn’t look like 

Craig: he 

Todd: was in that much that I would recognize. But God, 

Craig: he’s got an amazing, a great voice, a very recognizable voice. I, I guarantee if you watch this movie, you’ll see this guy and he’ll be like, oh yeah, that guy, that guy, yeah. I definitely see him, you know, know this guy. Anyway, so he shows James Woods this like.

Room behind glass that’s like just a metal, great floor. And the cat is in there. 

Todd: Mm-hmm. They picked up the cat from the street. Yeah. 

Craig: Some goon picked, picked up the cat. Right. Whatever. And they start playing. And I skipped something. He, when he was in the lobby, there was some guy in the lobby and he was super, super nervous.

And then his wife came out and the wife looked like she was in bad shape. Not good. Mm-hmm. So now he sees this room and the cat and they start playing twist and shout or something, I don’t know. And then they start shocking the cat. Like the floor is electrified. Yeah. Like they’re shocking the cat. And he says, well, the, the song is part of the conditioning.

Okay. Whatever. I don’t care. 

Todd: Yeah. 

Craig: But basically he tells, what I don’t understand about this is apparently that just by walking into the building, you have contracted yourself to this. I know. Yeah. When he, when he finds out this guy’s like, well, the first time operatives will be watching you all the time.

All the time. Yeah. It’s about, 

Todd: it’s about quitting smoking. 

Craig: Yeah. Yeah. And, and you won’t, you sometimes you’ll know they’re there, sometimes you won’t. They’re gonna be watching you all the time, and the first time you get caught, we put your wife in the electric shock room. Mm-hmm. The second time you get shot or get caught.

We put your daughter and, and, and they know where her school is. They know everything about him. Yeah. We put your daughter in the electric shock room. Third time your wife gets raped. Yeah. What? Wow. Excuse me. Ah, and he hasn’t agreed to anything like he, he was. A friend of his referred him to this place. He walks into the office, sat in the waiting room, and then got pulled into this office and this guy just starts telling him all this stuff.

Did he even pay? You 

Todd: know,

oh my God. It’s crazy. I don’t get it. It was so much better on the page, I’m sure, because I read this and the, the, the story just made me sick. Well, he then comes home and he’s freaked out. And I guess, you know, like, I don’t know, wouldn’t you like just call the cops or something at this point? But, uh, he sneaks downstairs, eventually wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to get a smoke.

He sneaks downstairs into his office, which is a room with the windows open. The blinds are wide open while he digs through his drawers and finds an an almost empty pack with one cigarette left in it when he pulls it out and gets ready to light it. The closet door in there kind of opens a little bit.

So then he goes over and he grabs an umbrella to pro to push it open. And then when he opens the second door, his golf clubs all fall out. So then he tosses the umbrella back into the closet and hears a oof from somebody. Now he looks in and sees ghees, which are surely not his. They’re wet sticking out from under the clothes.

They’re wet. And what does, he can see that they’re wet. What does he do? He’s just like. I didn’t smoke it. Notice I didn’t light it. Tears it up and walks out of the fucking room. What? I don’t know. I thought that part was scary. Oh, it was scary. But he leaves and goes back up to bed. What you think? There’s a guy in your closet, it’s pretty clear.

There’s a guy in your closet. You’re just gonna accept that and go to bed then. But 

Craig: then he goes and yells at the guy, like he goes back to the place and yells at the boss. Man’s like, there was somebody in my house. And he is like, yeah, well. It could happen. They do. They, they do their job. 

Todd: He doesn’t, he doesn’t really check the closet until the next day when the glosses are not there.

But then he sees dirt, you know, footprints coming out of it. I’m like, oh my God. So that was weird. I, I didn’t like that bit just ’cause I thought it was so dumb. 

Craig: My thinking was, yeah, there’s somebody in there and he knows that now, but he also knows who it is and so he doesn’t care. Well, it’s not that he doesn’t care, but like he’s so freaked out, like he 

Todd: thinks they’ll shoot him or something.

Craig: They’re not necessarily here to hurt me. They’re just watching. Right. I think he’s afraid of getting in trouble, like he doesn’t wanna get in trouble. Gotcha. Anyway, whatever. It doesn’t matter. Who cares? That’s fine. So then the next day he goes, I was a little confused about this. Mm-hmm. He goes and visits his daughter.

Drew Barrymore in a terrible wig and glasses and he gives her a legit cabbage patch kid. Love that. That was, that was big back then. That was big. 

Todd: I had 

Craig: one. Did you have 

Todd: one? Oh, I had one, yeah, for sure. Mine was a, um, was a ringmaster, a circus ringmaster. He had boots. He had a snazzy vest and outfit. He had a top hat.

He was badass. I might still have him. So I think I do. I think I do. 

Craig: Mine was. Before they started specifically making like the infant, like baby ones when they were still Cabbage Patch kids. Uhhuh. Mine was baldheaded except for a little tiny tuft of blonde hair at the top. They came with names. Oh yeah.

Birth certificates. Yeah. I don’t remember if. My Cabbage Patch kid came with its name. I mean, I know it came with name, but I remember that its name was Robby Lee. 

Clip: Okay. 

Craig: I don’t know if that’s the name that was on his birth certificate or if I made that up, but that was my little almost baldheaded. Oh my goodness.

Name 

Todd: Robbie. 

Craig: Lee, 

Todd: my Cabbage patch kid came from Babyland General Hospital down in Georgia. 

Craig: Oh gosh. That’s great. I love it. Do you 

Todd: know about this place? I think it still exists. No, it’s this, it’s this like house that you can go to and inside it’s a, it’s a hospital for Cabbage Patch kids. It’s where they’re born.

There is a cabbage patch inside here and you can gather around and witness them birthing cabbage patches. Gosh out. Oh my gosh. These cabbage patches, cabbages. Oh my God. That was a trip. I remember that. That’s where I got my ringmaster because they had a giant circus, kind of like an automated, like where they had put all the Cabbage Patch kids in, but then they could, like they were trapeze and there were things, and then they would all move and stuff in the middle.

And I was entranced by that. That was a whole thing. 

Craig: Yeah, I’m pretty sure mine 

Todd: came 

Craig: from Santa. Um, so anyway, so then, so he visits Drew Barrymore at her school and. That’s weird. Like, and I couldn’t tell what was going on with that. Like I almost felt like they were kind of telling Drew Berry more to maybe kind of play it kind of slow.

Yeah. Like why I didn’t understand what was happening. And it doesn’t appear that their child lives with them. Right, right. I, the only time we ever see her is at school. 

Todd: I guess you’re 

Craig: right. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. Whatever. And the guy from the smoking place shows up and menas him a little bit.

Yeah. Yeah. And then he gets stuck on a drawbridge. Ju just 

Todd: like the opening to a maximum overdrive. Remember, 

Craig: it’s the same bridge. I read that too. Oh, 

Todd: is it? I didn’t see that 

Craig: part. Yeah, it’s, it’s the, it’s the same bridge that that was filmed on and I Oh, that makes sense. I know. And when I read that, I was like.

Oh yeah, it looks like that bridge. I remember that bridge. Right. Okay. But he’s on a draw bridge. He’s looking around, he’s thinking, surely nobody will see me. One of the cars right next to him is a convertible and this guy is making out with a girl. And I am like, well, obviously that’s one of the, it’s him.

It’s obviously one of the watchers or whatever. 

Todd: You don’t think it’s the two kids completely unbuckled in the back of the station wagon. Front of him doing the pillow fight? No, I didn’t think it was them. There were so many dated things in this movie. It was really cute to watch. Like nobody does that anymore, obviously.

But it was not uncommon for us to ride in the backseat seat. Oh no, not at 

Craig: all. 

Todd: Station wagon without seat belts 

Craig: on. We didn’t wear seat 

Todd: belts. No, 

Craig: nobody wore seat belts back 

Todd: then. We had a seat that flipped up and face backwards. I don’t even think that’s legal anymore, but we had had it installed in our Volvo station wagon.

It was this hard as hell seat that I think was plywood covered with like the thinnest amount of fabric you could get and it would flip up kind of open up, and there were seat belts, but we would be facing backwards. It’s like enough for two small kids to sit next to each other facing whoever was coming up behind you.

Probably the most unsafe thing in the world when you think about it. Somebody rear ends you. Uh, yeah. God. 

Craig: My mom drove a minivan for decades. She’s out of her minivan phase, but she drove a minivan for decades and the first minivan that I remember that she had didn’t have three seats. Instead, it had the second seat that folded down into a full.

Bed and it was amazing when we would go places on vacation and stuff and my, you know, that were long drives, we would just drive through the night because my parents could put that bed down and my sister and I would sleep in the back. Blankets, pillows, I’m telling you, it was a full size bed. And then we’d wake up in the morning and we’d be there.

Oh God. And they wouldn’t have had to have dealt with kids. Yeah, through the whole drive. It was amazing. I loved it. It’s 

Todd: different time 

Craig: anyway. What were we talking about? I don’t know. I think there’s a movie that we watched. He discovers cigarettes in the glove box. Yeah, he just in the glove box and he thinks he’s gonna be real sneaky and he puts shades on.

Oh my gosh. Leans down, smokes and ducks 

Todd: down. It’s so funny actually, because the smoke is clearly coming up in the car and then you just see this arm come up and try to wave it all over. You like 

Craig: wave it away. I’ve been there. I get it. I quit smoking though. I, I mean, I, I switched it for vaping, so I’m not gonna brag too much.

But, um, no, it’s something, it’s definitely something I did. I, I quit smoking smokers out there. If you didn’t think you could do it, I didn’t think I could do it, but I can. And it wasn’t as hard as I thought it was gonna be. In fact, one day I just smoked my last cigarette and that was it. Wow. And then I just started 

Clip: vaping.

Todd: You had to replace it with something, but it’s somehow, that’s a little bit, 

Craig: yeah. I, I don’t have like a cold and a sore throat. All year round anymore. Mm. For the longest time when I smoked cigarettes, I was always sick. I always had a cold, you know, go back and listen to our old episodes. I used to put Todd through the ringer.

Oh. Editing out my coughing. You don’t know how many coughs I had to edit out this guys. Mm-hmm. You can do it. It’s, it’s possible, but it is hard for some people. My dad’s been struggling with it forever. He just, he can’t beat it, but, so he smokes and he gets caught. And they put his wife in the shock room.

Todd: Yep. And then it, it’s interesting because then he goes into the, the room, I guess, to meet her after the shock room. He’s gotta confront her and they watch it on camera, but there’s no sound. And one of his goons is like, uh, 

Clip: hey boss ain’t gonna turn the sound up. There’s no reason to. When you’ve been in a business as long as I have, you get to know every line.

In 30 seconds, she’s either gonna squeeze this guy hard enough to give him a hernia, or she’s gonna slap him in the face and walk out. 

Todd: They make bets on which it’s gonna be, and sure enough, she embraces him. Hard to imagine. But, uh, I don’t know. I think it’s an interesting concept. And like I said, I think it worked a lot better on the page.

Yeah, on the screen, everything seems so extreme that it’s really hard to buy into, but you just go with it really quickly. Now it’s suddenly like they’re all on good terms now. Right. Like he’s been through the program. He’s been off smoking for a while, apparently now he’s with that guy at his goon and they’re in his, off his office.

But it’s like a little medical checkup and he is like, you gotta keep this target weight. And they’re, yeah. And they’re chummy, like, yeah, they’re friendly. Mm-hmm. Like, thank you, thank you for threatening me to help me cut smoking. But then he jokes as he leaves. This is what I remembered so much as a kid.

I don’t remember again if it was from the movie or from the, the, the story, but he jokes with him and he is like, now you gotta keep that target weight up or whatever like that. And then James Woods is like, ah, what are you gonna do? Come home and do something else? He says, no, I’ll just go home and cut your wife’s finger off, whatever.

And then the last scene. Which I thought was great is he’s sitting at the table two couples having that classic eighties dinner party with the linen table claws and the candelabra that they bring out. And, uh, they’re toasting him and his friend who brought him there originally, and their wives are toasting.

Two Quitters Inc. And as the, as his friend’s wife raises her glass, he sees that her pinky finger is indeed cut off. So the idea is that this is probably, he’s never gonna be out of this, right? That he’s always gonna be under the gun and it’s kind of. It’s scary as 

Craig: hell. Yeah. Again, by every account that I’ve heard, James Woods is kind of an asshole, but he’s a good actor.

He is. And I liked him and he’s real young in this. Yeah, I liked that one. And then the cat gets away. Yeah. And takes the ferry to Atlantic City. Oh my God, that is so funny. Or something, I don’t know. And then. It goes, drew Barrymore is in a commercial on television. Again, like, help me. It’s still coming for me.

It’s getting closer. Okay. This story, I do remember reading this story, and I think that this story is excellent. I think that this is an excellent short story. Mm. And it was first published in Penthouse Magazine, which is perfect. Ah, Stephen King did that a lot. I mean, he was a, yeah. Playboy penthouse. Yeah.

He was a young writer. This was his job. He was getting paid. He would get this shit published wherever he could get it published, and it was Playboy and it was penthouse, but. Other more mainstream publications too. Well, and like, I just think this, I think this is a great penthouse story. It’s seedy. Mm-hmm.

I mean, it’s not porny at all. No, no. At all. But it’s set in a world. That is appropriate 

Todd: for Penthouse Magazine? I think, well, I mean, it was an honor. I mean, to have a short story and it’s so quaint now. You can’t who even reads a magazine now? I know, right? But magazines used to be a very big outlet for starting writers to publish their short stories, and Playboy was one of the biggest magazines.

If you had a, if you had a story in Playboy, you were well respected. You know, they’re not just sex stories or anything like that. Like really, they would have actual. Literary short stories in there. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, for sure. Yeah. He made a big, when he did that, it helped him along his way anyway. Right. But yeah, I, I agree.

I like this one too. It’s okay. It’s better. I think. Again, it’s better on the page, but I was just enthralled by the very beginning. What, where they get this cat back in here. Because the cat makes it to Atlantic City, and we follow this guy out of, out of the casino that he owns. He’s your typical mafia boss kind of dude.

He’s a Yeah. Big wig. Mm-hmm. And I, he was clearly making an entrance, right. As an actor. It’s one of those deals where they concealed his face, like we’re just following behind him as he walks out the front door of his very busy casino, and then he spins around to answer someone’s question, and I imagine at the time the entire audience would be go, oh, it’s him.

Mm-hmm. Kenneth. McMillan, who’s been in a million things, and you’d recognize him as well. He was in Dune just before this. He was in Amadeus. He was in, um, a lot on television. Oh yeah. Dog day afternoon, Stepford wives, Serco, taking of Pellum, 1, 2, 3. I really liked the taking of Pellum. 1, 2, 3. And he’s the borough commander in that one.

The original there was a remake, but the original 19 74 1 is fantastic. Right. Anyway, yeah. So he, he makes his entrance and then he and some guy he knows, noticed the cat. Across the street trying to, it stuck. It’s stuck in the median and they make bets as to whether or not the cat will make it across or not.

I loved the sequence and I do not know how they shot this while keeping that cat safe. There was one spot where they were clearly overlays, two shots, but a lot of the rest of it, I don’t know if they just had glass up to keep the cat from moving too far or whatever, but I was scared for that damn cat.

And the cat does end up making it across the street, so the boss guy wins. But not without two cars swerving to avoid him crashing into each other. I wasn’t scared for the cat. Yeah, well you knew the cat was gonna live. That cat knows what’s up.

I loved that bit. And you know it’s funny how like. A lot of these anthology stories, they don’t try to tie their wraparound or framing stories in as well as this one does. That cat is a fixture. Oh yeah, absolutely. In every one of these stories and has his little moment in this one. Before we get onto the story, you know, 

Craig: as we’ve already said, but I want to e.

Size again, this cat is a good actor and like I’m invested in his story. Yeah. No joke, right? Oh God, I am, I, I am with this cat all the way. It, it turns out, it turns out that this big boss man, his girlfriend is having an affair. With the guy from airplane. Yes. Robert Hayes. Yeah. The Mob Mafia type guy. Like confronts the airplane guy.

And what, what, what does he does? He objective does make him an offer. Like, like you can have, you can have her, if. Or something. I don’t know. 

Todd: He sends his girlfriend away because he knows he’s in trouble. He owes money or something like that, or he is stolen money. I’m not quite sure what it was, but as soon as these guys abduct him, just as soon as she’s, he’s set her away, they plant heroin in his car and drive it to a.

Parking garage and he threatens that he’s going to call the police and he’s gonna tell ’em about the heroin and this guy’s gonna be in big trouble. Or he can make a wager. If he wins the wager, he can have the money back. He won’t call the police and he can have his wife. Yeah. And so they go, and the wager is that there’s this just very narrow, you know, five inch ledge that goes around the entire.

Building. They’re up on, I don’t know, the penthouse suite of some very, very, very tall New York skyscraper type thing. And uh, he’s like, you can just walk around the whole thing, then you win. Yeah. 

Craig: And I remember this being really, really good. Like it, it’s a really good story. Hmm. It doesn’t transfer as well?

No. To the screen, I don’t think, because ultimately it just gets boring. Like, yeah. On the page. The tension is so high and I, I don’t remember what the narrative perspective is, but I don’t remember if we’re in this guy’s head, but it’s just very tense here. We’re just watching a guy scoot along a ledge like, yeah.

I get, I 

Todd: get it. A bird packs at him for a while, right? The guy pops out and throws things at him and blasts water at him every now and then. But maybe the only scary I, I don’t know. The only real tense part is when he like gets to this sign that stuck to the side of the building and the sign kind of falls apart and he is dangling from it for a while.

But I don’t know, I just always felt like I knew he was gonna make. Yeah, because what, well, how’s this story gonna end? Do you just plummets off the ledge? That’s, that’s no fun. So I knew he was gonna make it, so I just, I felt like I was just watching him go through the paces here. And you’re right, it’s kind of slow.

Craig: I mean, it’s fine. I mean, things happen visually. It’s good. Like you said, like, like a pigeon. Peck him and he is like, ow, you little pecker. Oh, that’s funny. There’s a pecker joke in the next one too. Mm-hmm. I don’t know. And like, yeah, he has to like climb up an electrical cord and stuff and the cat is there and there’s a shootout.

I don’t remember. Yeah, I, I guess the, a shootout between the, I don’t know, good guys and bad guys or whatever, but it ultimately ends up with him making the mob guy. Do the ledge. Yeah, and I think that’s how the story ended too. Yeah. I think the story may have been a little bit more ambiguous in the end, but for sure he makes the mob guy get out on the ledge and do the walk or whatever.

In the movie, I don’t remember what happens in the book, but in the movie, that same rascally pigeon. Peck’s at the heavy mob guy and he falls off and dies. Yeah, he doesn’t last long. The end. The end. And so then the cat catches a train to Wilmington, North Carolina. Yes. This cat knows how to get around. It gets around God, and this is my favorite one.

And I love it. I love it from start to finish. It’s so good. I love that. As, as soon as the cat arrives, we are introduced to this new family and the way that we’re introduced to them is that we see a, a strange. Point of view shot from what could be a cat? Yeah. Because it’s small and quick and low to the ground, but it’s also making funny noises like Yeah, it’s like evil dead cam going through the, but tiny, yeah, but small because ’cause it’s real close to the ground, it’s really small and it turns out that it’s some kind of troll and apparently.

The essence of Drew Barrymore has been warning the cat, like this thing is coming for me. Apparently now it’s there and it’s founder Uhhuh, but the cat gets there at the same time. Thank God, just in time too. Really Just in 

Todd: time. The girl, Amanda is her name, drew Barrymore, and she’s got these lovely parents.

They have this lovely house in this place and, and, uh, she just, the cat runs up to her and into the house, I think, and she’s like, can we keep it? Can we keep it? And she calls it general, but they insist on putting the cat out every night. And at some point the mom 

Craig: does. Yeah. Her mom’s kind of a bitch.

She’s, she’s a little, she’s not nice to this cat. Well, she’s, she’s just a mom. She’s doing her best. I shouldn’t 

Todd: judge her. Alright. I remember this little conversation between her and her father at breakfast. 

Clip: Your mom just happened to have a conference call with Nana, uh, last evening and Nana told your mom that, um, cats steal kids’ breath.

Why would general take my breath if he has his own? Ah, well, you have to put all the animals outside in the night. I mean, especially the cat animals, because if you don’t, they climb up and sit on your chest and suck all your bread out like this. That is very, very helpful. Hugh, 

Todd: is that a thing or is that just something Stephen King made of 

Craig: it’s, it’s an old wive’s tale.

No. Is it? Okay. I think it’s an old wive’s tale. Mm-hmm. That’s 

Todd: cool. 

Craig: I think people specifically say it about babies like infants. That makes a lot of sense because cats do like to sleep with you and like if a cat were to sleep on a baby’s head. Then that would be bad. That could be problematic, right? I think that’s where it comes from.

Todd: When I was a baby and we were living in Fort Worth, Texas, my parents had a very problematic cat named Tigger and they said there was something wrong with Tigger that like, it was a very neurotic, strange cat. And they came and found Tigger once in my crib, snarling at me, and that’s when they realized Tigger has to go.

Craig: That’s funny. I’ve been exposed 

Todd: to cat on infant violence in my life. Apparently. 

Craig: We’re, we’re telling lots of personal stories 

Todd: this episode. We really are, 

Craig: but the, I, I almost 

Todd: shouldn’t, I almost shouldn’t tell you what happened to Tigger. Oh, well now you have to, both of my parents are nurses. You know that.

Yeah. And my dad decided to play nurse anesthetist himself on Tigger. He put Tigger in his favorite cage with his favorite blanket and all that stuff in the garage behind the exhaust pipe of the car, and put Tigger to sleep himself. Yeah. Well, that’s all right. They knew that they couldn’t give Tigger away to any other family because Tigger was really that problematic.

So they decided to, yeah, my dad, I don’t know how he feels a little guilty about, I don’t know if he feels guilty. We, we’ve, we don’t talk about it much, but I haven’t really probed him on that one and. All these things, what difference does it make? I mean, it doesn’t matter, you know, not that was a 

Craig: humane, it was, it was humane.

It’s fine. He did it in a humane way. Yeah. My, yeah. I think my grandpa, if there were unwanted litters, I mean, he was a farmer and they didn’t, you know. Spay or neuter their animals. So if there was an unwanted litter, he would just like put ’em in a sack and throw ’em in the pond. Oh no. Are you serious? Oh God.

Yeah. But what I was going to say was we never had pets growing up. Because my parents, when my mom was pregnant with me, they had a dog that they loved, I can’t remember what its name was. I think it was like a spaniel, some kind of spaniel. And they loved it so, so much. And literally like the day before or just days before I was born, it got hit by a car.

In front of their house and my dad had to shoot it with a gun to put it out of his misery. Aw. And we never had pets until I was like a teenager. We finally got a cat.

Man, 

Todd: that’s funny. 

Craig: But I always really wanted a pet, just like Drew Barrymore really wants this cat really bad, and she already has a parat. Mm-hmm. But I Did you go on. It’s so funny, like, did you ever have birds? I, I don’t, no. My mom hates birds. My mom, my parents is scared of birds and so we never had them.

Allen had a bird. I wish I could. Remember his name. It’s like Chewy or El Chapo or something. I don’t remember. But he talks about it and he and his mom loved that bird. I think they’re disgusting and I think that’re disgusting to have in your house. But she has one, and the mom doesn’t want to have the bird, or excuse me, the mom doesn’t want ke the cat because she’s afraid that, well, it seems like she just doesn’t like.

No, the cat. The cat, anyway. But she says, you know, it’ll get the bird or whatever. But Drew Barrymore is like, but I’ve been having these bad dreams where a monster comes out of my wall. Mm-hmm. And general will protect me. Yeah. And that’s true. That’s what is happening. There is a monster in her wall.

General finds a way into the house. It’s horrifying. It is horrifying. 

Todd: Yeah. You know, again, as a kid, this was just, just. Really hits you where it hurts, right? You’re always worried about the monsters in your bedroom. Yeah. And this little opening, almost like a little mouse hole, just kind of folds itself back down at the baseboard in this one spot in her room.

And this little troll comes out and it’s green and it’s kind of gremlin like. And it is fantastic. And I love what they’re doing here with this creature. Me too. It’s not stop motion. It’s like a combination of a little puppet, but mostly it’s, it’s the gate. It’s what they did with the gate where you got Yes, yes.

Just this giant sized set and a person in costume, Uhhuh. It’s so good. And, and I love it. The creature was designed by, um, Carlo Aldi, who did, you know, we’ve done, um, a couple Italian movies that he, uh, he did makeup and, and, uh, puppetry and stuff effects for, but then he went on to do et he designed the ET creature.

King Kong. 

Craig: I love. Love. I love it. I love it. It’s familiar. Like I think she says something about, yeah, you know that, you know that story. The three Billy Goats gruff. It’s like that, but it lives in my wall and it is like, it’s kind of familiar as a troll, but it’s also. Unique. Yes, it’s a great 

Todd: design. 

Craig: It’s, it’s fantastic.

It has this kind of flat nose, and I mean, it, it’s got like these razor, these tiny razor sharp teeth, but its mouth articulates in a way that a human mouth doesn’t. Yeah, like it’s it, its lips seem to have multiple points of articulation, like, yeah, I don’t know. It’s really cool. It looks great. The only thing, and this isn’t a criticism because I don’t care, but the only thing is I couldn’t really get a gauge on its size because sometimes it looked like it was the size of a.

Softball. Right. And sometimes it looked a little bit bigger. It is a little unclear. Yeah, it, but I, I didn’t care. It looks great. Like, I loved the stuff where they were clearly filming it on oversized sets. It looks fantastic. 

Todd: So good. 

Craig: I loved the stuff when it was like crawling on Drew Barrymore, and I don’t know how they did that.

And does it look. A hundred percent real. No, but it looks great and looks good enough. Yeah. And it’s scary. Like I said, when I was a kid, this is the one that stuck with me because it was scary. Yeah. And you know, she, she try, she doesn’t really know what’s going on ’cause she’s asleep as she, I guess, kind of remembers it or is dreaming it or whatever.

And she tries to tell her parents and they brush it aside as parents do. Yeah. I mean, it’s a monster in your room, of course, when you’re a kid. I mean, when, I don’t know. I don’t know if I remember it or it’s just, we’ve seen so many of these movies, but like that’s so frustrating when parents just kind of brush, brush it aside, like, yeah, okay, well I guess when you find me dead, then maybe you’ll take me seriously.

Right. Is almost what happens here. It is like, mom, the, the troll kills the bird. Mm-hmm. And the, the cat tries to, I don’t know, stop it, protect the girl. I don’t know. But the cat gets implicated in the death of the bird. Yes. So the mom captures it in a box and takes it to a kill shelter where it is going to be killed the next.

Day. 

Todd: Yeah. That was fast. Right? Jesus. I love that the dad picks up the cat and no, before mom takes it away because mom does this while dad is gone at work. I love it how he picks up the cat and he sees that it has a wound on his shoulder. And he’s like, that’s that’s a pretty big wound on there. And uh, she’s like, oh, well it looks like Polly got one more peck at it.

You know, before it got, and he’s like, I certainly never realized that Polly has such a big pecker. That’s our second pecker joke. Do you think there was a pecker joke in the first one that we missed? 

Craig: I 

Todd: don’t know. Is that another through line for this? I don’t know. 

Craig: I don’t know. But this one made me laugh really hard.

And this dad has played by somebody recognizable too. Oh yeah. Famous. I, I couldn’t figure out, I, I didn’t know him from anything in particular. It was just another one of those guys I’ve seen in many things 

Todd: been everything. Yeah. 

Craig: So, yeah, so the cat is gone, but it’s also very crafty, so it tricks the worker, like, it pretends like it’s really.

Sleepy. And then when the worker opens the door, it bolts out. Mm-hmm. And I believe that because cats are crafty. Oh yeah. That’s one of the things that I like about them. And they’re fast too. Yeah, they are very fast. I love cats. And it, and it escapes and it runs through the rain. And cats hate being wet, so it must really care about this girl.

Mm-hmm. It runs back to her house where the troll. Is making its big play. It has put a door stop in the door and it gets up on her chest and it starts sucking out her breath and she’s like coughing and and stuff. And then. The cat shows up and it and the troll have a big fight. Oh man, this fight 

Todd: is awesome.

It’s all over the room. It’s with everything I know. So good marbles and toys. Oh my God. And roller skates being thrown and somehow the, a big dictionary falls down in front of his hole so he can’t get back away and, yep. He ends up on the record player? 

Craig: No, before that he try, he tries to float away on some helium balloons.

Yes. And he’s like, he’s like bobbing up and down on the helium balloons. And it was so funny, like they’re showing the cat like swatting at this thing, dangling from helium balloons and it’s just obviously some inanimate thing and the cat swats it and just starts spinning, spinning, spinning. So then they cut to.

A shot of the troll and it’s like the troll is just spinning, spinning and it’s like, ah.

Oh, it’s so funny. Yeah. But yeah, you’re right. It lands on the record player, which plays. The police is, I’ll be watching you or whatever. Yeah. Which is the second time we’ve heard it. But it’s funny. And Drew Barrymore is shouting from her bed. 

Clip: Play it faster. Play it faster. 

Todd: And the cat is dutifully flipping.

Rrp upping the RPMs. Oh. Like he knows. 

Craig: This is so funny. Oh, it’s hilarious. Like young people today, anybody. Any younger than us, I feel like. Did you have a record player? I did. I had one. Oh, 

Todd: yeah. Yeah, we did. I had my own record player. We had a family record player. We could stack multiple records up on it and they’d come down automatically.

Uhhuh. Oh yeah. I had one in my room. I would just play all the time, 

Craig: I think. Oh. Oh. Well, my dad had like a nice. Stereo. I had a Fisher-Price record player. Yeah. But it worked. Mine was, mine was like a Fisher-Price 

Todd: one. Yeah. It was like a, you know, it was mostly plastic, I think. But it worked. You play records on it.

Yeah. 

Craig: Yeah. I, I feel like we are the last kinda are generation that experienced that and, and to know, as I recall, mine only had two speeds. Mm-hmm. There was. A faster RPM and a slower RPM? Yeah, the 45 and the 35 I think. Yeah, right. This one. This one apparently is just like on a sliding scale and he can turn it up.

So it sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks on speed. And he does. And. You see the little troll like holding onto the the little knob central post and the thing and it’s going, ah,

I love it’s little noises. It’s cute. You’ve gotta put in some kind of clip of it’s little noises ’cause they’re so funny and it shoots off into her box fan. Fan, her box fan. Oh my God. And gets totally obliterated as though this were some kind of like industrial, right? Oh, it just gets, it just gets obliterated and it’s hilarious.

And then the, what I didn’t, I didn’t remember this. And what I find most funny is the parents come in. Yeah. And they think that the cat has done something bad and the girl tells them what really happened, and they look at the fan and it’s all blood and guts and gross stuff, but there’s a little troll arm uhhuh and a little troll dagger, and they pick it up and the mom’s like, okay, you can keep the cat.

Just don’t tell anybody about this. 

Clip: What? What? Such a 

Craig: weird reaction, right? Like no one can know. That we had a little troll in our house. You could keep the cat so long as you don’t tell anybody. 

Todd: It’s almost like she’s blackmailing them now, because now you see the general is like eating a fish, like 

Craig: a Bronzino, really on a silver platter 

Todd: with parsley garnish.

Craig: And then he goes up the last scene, he goes up and the cat jumps up on Drew Barrymore’s chest and gets right up next to her. Almost like, you know, like they thought it was gonna steal her breath, but instead it just. Licks her mouth, which is gross. It just ate a big, raw fish is disgusting. However, I have animals, my dogs lick their butt holes and then they come kiss me on the mouth.

Yeah. And I don’t care. So it’s a cute, I it’s, it’s actually kind of cute. I thought it was a 

Todd: very cute ending, especially since it was established this old wives tale and it turns out that it’s the troll doing it, not the cat. And then the cat licks her instead of taking a breath. It’s so cute. 

Craig: Yeah, it’s very cute.

Todd: And then. Credits and there’s a cat’s eye song. 

Craig: Oh, is there? I didn’t even, you do, listen, all I saw, no, the credits started coming up and they list the actors first, and Drew Barrymore is listed first and just credited as. Our girl, uh, which I thought was cute, but I didn’t pay attention to the song. I didn’t know there was a cat’s eye 

Todd: song.

He should have listened to the chorus. It’s like cat’s eye. You’ve Got a cat’s Eye. Something like that is so, it’s so charmingly eighties and com. Entirely forgettable, but I, I love it what a movie has. Theme song that references the title at the end. Yeah, it’s always good. Me too. I really enjoyed this. I mean, look, I mean I did think that the second one was a little slow.

I thought the first one read better on the page. I think we, we both kind of came to that conclusion. They’re not amazing. A creep show is way better. Both the creep shows are way better. Yeah. But true. The through line of the cat is just so charming and it’s so well done. Yeah. And the third story just like makes up for it all.

And I love, I enjoyed it. I just had a good time with it. Yeah. 

Craig: Yeah, and even in the first two, I don’t think they’re great, but I also don’t think they’re bad. In fact, like the acting in them is quite good. Yeah. If you haven’t seen it, you should definitely watch it and I think that you’ll like it and or slash appreciate it because it is well done.

It is just I would a hundred times go back and watch the third segment again. I don’t necessarily need to watch the first two over and over. I’ve seen them. They were good. That’s fine. The third one’s great and I love it, and I would watch it a hundred times. Over. But if you’ve never seen it, I think you’ll like it.

I do think you’ll like it. 

Todd: Yeah. I, I recommend it highly. I don’t know. I, I recommend it if you’re looking for an anthology, it’s nice. There are worse ones out there. Yeah. There are better ones out there. It’s just fun. Yeah. And if you’re a cat lover, a hundred percent. Gorgeous cat. 

Craig: Beautiful cat in this movie.

Todd: Well, thank you so much for listening to another episode. If you enjoyed this, please share it with a friend. Please write a review of this show only if you like it on Apple Podcasts or wherever you review podcasts. Please, uh, help us spread the word. You can join our Patreon by going to patreon.com/chainsaw podcast, and for just five bucks a month, you can get.

Complete unedited phone calls that we use for this, and we got some juicy stories in this one. So you get your money’s worth sometimes with some of these weeks anyway, you can get that. You get mini SOS that we put up or reviews. We have a book club going there. We have a lot of fun activity on our Paton that’s.

patreon.com/chainsaw podcast. Also, just chainsaw horror.com is our website. Send us a message there as well. Send us a voice message right there as well. There’s a speak to us link for that, and you can sign up for our newsletter, our weekly newsletter Tells you a little bit about what’s going on in horror from this week and the previous week, and, uh, tells you a little bit about what’s coming up next on our show and what’s happening with the patients.

Thank you so much, listeners, for listening, and until next time, I’m Todd. And I’m Craig with Two Guys and a Chainsaw.