Eloise

Eloise

Well, it ain’t gonna win any awards. You know how much fun it is popping bubble wrap? Poking through the plot holes in this film held about as much entertainment for us in this hour-long episode. Give it a listen and feel free to laugh along with us.

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Eloise (2017)

Episode 86, 2 Guys and a Chainsaw Horror Movie Review Podcast

Todd:  Hello, and welcome to another episode of 2 Guys and a Chainsaw. I’m Todd.

Craig: And I’m Craig.

Todd: Today’s film is a pretty fresh and recent one, came out in February of this year, called Eloise. Now Eloise flew completely under my radar. Did it go directly to video, or was it actually released in the theaters, Craig? Do you what do you know about this movie? 

Craig:  I know very little about it. I assume it must have gone direct to video because I had heard nothing about it. In fact, the only reason that I came across this movie is I just happened to, well, I was at work and I had nothing to do. Kind of a long story. I don’t usually just sit around at work watching YouTube. But, anyway, on this particular day, I had nothing to do, so I just searched full horror movie on, YouTube, and this popped up. And I had never heard of it. I had no idea what it was.   I was surprised to see that it was 2017, and it was, available on YouTube. It’s since been pulled, so I’m sure it was, posted. I’m sure it was posted illegally. But in that small window when it was available on YouTube, I I watched it because I had the time, and that that’s it. I mean, I had I had never heard of it at all. I had no idea it had even existed, which kinda surprised me because it’s got some big names attached to it. 

Todd:  Yeah. It does have, to be fair, a bit of that direct to video feel to it. That that might be one of the criticisms that I have of the movie. But you’re right, Chase Crawford is in it. I think he’s, been in Gossip Girl. He has a 1,000,000,000 roles. He at least 19 on on IMDB. And he has the kind of face that looks it’s that common face right now, like, everybody looks like Chase Crawford. 

Craig:  Yeah. Handsome young guy. Yeah. 

Todd:  Yeah. Dark, and and, you know, it’s like Thor. And, yeah, he just looks he just looks like, about 5 or 6 different actors. And then, Sure. Eliza Dushku. Yeah? And she’s been in a number of things as well. 

Craig:  Oh, I love her. I’m a I’m a huge fan of hers, and that’s really the thing that hooked me to get me to watch the movie. I thought if she was attached to it, she was in it. It couldn’t be that bad. I guess that remains to be seen. We’ll see. But, yeah, she, of course, most people probably know her from, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She was Faith, on that, and She she reprised that role on Angel, the spin off, and then she worked with Josh Whedon.   She worked with Josh Whedon again on Dollhouse, but that was, short lived. But yeah, she’s been around. She’s, worked in the genre. She was in the original Wrong Turn. So she’s, she’s worked in the genre, and and I like her. She’s gorgeous. She’s tough. She’s a cool girl.   So I was I was that that hooked me. That’s what got me to watch the movie. 

Todd:  And even, the the villain in this case is Robert Patrick. And, I mean, here’s a person who if if you don’t recognize his name, you totally recognize his face. He’s been in, like, every movie, I think. Just every movie. He has a part in it. 

Craig:  Yeah. He was the he was the badass Terminator in Terminator 2. He’s, you know, big guy. 

Todd:  Yeah. Real cool. So, yeah, you’ve got these stars, and then the director, is Robert Legato who is a visual effects wiz. I think this was his first directorial effort or at least the most recent one. He’s directed some TV shows, but but not no movies until now. But Titanic, he did the visual effects, Apollo 13, Hugo. Yep. Sadly Mhmm.   Probably not a fantastic debut movie for him. 

Craig:  Yeah. And I was kinda surprised by that, you know, because he’s worked on, like you said, those big movies like Titanic and Apollo 13, The New Jungle Book, which got, you know, rave reviews for its effects. So I’m thinking, oh, man. We’re in for something good here. Sadly, I I feel like he he must have been kind of constrained by the budget.   While the while while there’s, you know, there’s there’s good attempts at visual effects here, it just doesn’t seem like it had the money behind it to really be great. 

Todd:  Well, I sort of felt actually like the visual effects were maybe the standout part of the movie. I mean, I was watching this, and I seriously, I was expecting something super low budget. And I and clearly, it was low budget, but either the technology’s getting better, or this guy had, some friends and some tricks up his sleeve, because I was pretty impressed, at how it rose above a little bit, the typical kind of visual effects transitions and things like that that you get on what I again assume, is a straight to DVD movie. Right. Yeah. I don’t know that some of the parts that, most, intrigued me about the movie were the bits. There are a lot of flashback scenes and things, but the transitions between them are are kind of inventive, and I’m sure we’ll talk about some of that as we go a little later. But, everything else about the movie honestly was not terribly inventive. 

Craig:  No. Not really. And and I I think you can probably tell from our tone already that we’re not super impressed with this movie. But even before I started watching it, I looked at some of the reviews, and the reviews were not great. Frankly, I I don’t think it’s that bad. You know? I I think that it’s it’s it’s a it’s a fine movie. It’s decent. It’s not great.   It’s not particularly unique or original. Basically, what it comes down to is a haunted asylum, and it it’s, you know, you’ve we’ve seen those movies before, and this doesn’t do a whole lot different than what I’ve seen before with those movies. But really, the thing that I found most intriguing about this movie really is not anything to do with the movie at all, but it’s rather just the, history behind the title, Eloise, which I had never heard of this place before. But apparently, this was a real asylum in Michigan, and the movie opens up with this text across the screen that says, Eloese was the largest insane asylum in the country. What started as one building in 18/32 grew into 78 buildings covering 900 acres in Todd, Michigan. Rumors of inhumane testing and treatment of patients administered by doctor HH Grice and a devastating fire officially closed LOEs in 1982. Only 4 of the original 78 buildings still stand. And that idea of this this bizarre history of this asylumhospital that really became its own town.   I mean it was so large, It had its own post office. It had its own zip code. It had its own tavern and, the fire department and and police station. And it really, for a very long time, from the thirties to the eighties, existed as this odd community. And and I found the history just absolutely fascinating. Of course, everything that happens in the movie is fictionalized based around that historic place. 

Todd:  Yeah. And, like, what is it about Michigan? Did they, like, give off tax credits or something back in the day, back in the 1800 for building asylums and mental health facilities there. I mean 

Clip:  Why do you have no idea? 

Todd:  Kellogg, you know, Kellogg had his big famous place there as well. It was a big sprawling kind of a state thing, pretty interesting. So, yeah. Anyway, clearly a slightly different history from the actual history of the facility. I think that was kind of funny, actually, about the film, a bit of a punch line for me, but I think we’ll get to that, later as we continue to talk about it. But, yeah, the movie opens up with a kind of a bookend. And honestly, in my opinion, a pretty unnecessary bookend. You know, usually with these kind of bookended tales, there’s kind of a punch line at the end or some kind of point to some kind of extra reveal when when you have this kind of thing, and and there really wasn’t for this movie.   In fact, all it really did was serve to tell us what was gonna happen. Yeah. 

Craig:  Yeah. I I thought so too. I mean, it it just kinda felt like an unnecessary spoiler, you know. Like, the the first scene we see is is kind of, I guess, a flash back scene. It’s supposed to be at the asylum, and there’s this this this patient, this male patient, and it’s all in black and white, and he’s talking to his doctor. 

Clip:  I I just wanna say, doctor Graves, that I’m feeling a lot better today than I was yesterday, and yesterday, I was feeling better than, before that. And tomorrow, I’m gonna feel better. Doctor Blake, Laurie. Help me, doctor Greyson. Fine. 

Craig:  Of course, you know, this is supposed to horrify us because he’s receiving this unnecessary treatment or whatever. And then I feel like there’s kind of some news reports on the fire that destroyed most of the facility, and it talked about how Doctor. Grice, the guy who’s played by Robert Patrick, who ends up being our villain, how he was killed in the fire. And the news report talks about how there the locals still to this day hear screams from the remains and, still see apparitions and ghosts. And then you get to that that wrap around that you talk about where we see this young woman, her name ends up being Pia, played by Eliza Dushku. It appears that she’s in some sort of facility, an asylum or a hospital or something. You you assume it’s maybe an asylum because it appears that the windows, are barred and and those types of things. And she’s visited by a detective who comes in and tells her that kids found Dell’s body 2 days ago.   Of course, we don’t know who that is yet. We find out soon. And says, we also found your brother, Scott’s remains. All of this is just exposition delivered through this doctor. He says, you know, because it was such a intensive gas explosion, We had to look at the dental records to identify these guys, but, we were able to do that. And he says, but we didn’t find Jacob. 

Clip:  Again, we have no idea what he’s talking about. 

Craig:  And and then he pulls out this this case file, and he says it’s from a previous patient. And it appears like he pulls out Jacob’s birth certificate and some sketches, but we can’t really see what these sketches are. And then it just cuts to the title, Eloise. And then we start out in what we assume is present day, with this guy Jacob, who’s a mechanic, getting a call from his dad’s lawyer. And like you said, you know, the the wrap around the bookend, ultimately you know, in the beginning, I didn’t really know what was going on. I’m like, okay, intrigued. That’s great. But then as soon as we’re introduced to Jacob, I’m like, okay.   Well, I guess I’m not gonna get too invested in his character. 

Todd:  Exactly. 

Craig:  We know we know how this is gonna end up. Yeah. But but that’s yeah. That’s where the the the plot begins. 

Todd:  That’s right. I also like the sort of, deadpan delivery of, oh, by the way, we found your brother’s body. There’s no, like, sorry for your loss. I know this must be hard for you. Right. It it is kind of funny, and it’s all kind convoluted. The setup is pretty corny. Jacob is working on a car.   Apparently, he owns this body repair shop or at least he works there, And he gets a phone call and the phone call is immediately, it’s from a guy who introduces himself as his father’s lawyer, and he says, Well, I haven’t talked to my father in 2 years. And once again, he’s like, well, your father’s dead. Yeah. He died, like, 2 days ago, and, we we need you to come here, for the funeral or for the reading of the will or something. At first, I thought he said we we need you to come here for the funeral, but later on, we find out that the funeral happened, like, 2 days ago. It it was it was kind of strange, like, I’m I’m sorry. Even though your son is you might be estranged, like, you’re dead now. People are gonna contact your son.   Somebody has to take care of you, you know, at the end. Family members don’t just get called long after the funerals of their of their immediate family. You know what I mean? 

Craig:  One would think. Yeah. One would think. 

Todd:  Anyway, he ends up leaving immediately even though they’ve been estranged for 2 years and even though apparently this funeral’s already happened. He immediately packs all of his things, hops on his motorcycle, and just leaves the car he was working on, to go to Detroit. And Yeah. Ends up in the office of this lawyer. And the lawyer again, gives us a big pile of exposition. He’s his only heir since he doesn’t have a mother, he doesn’t have a sister or anything like that, and so he’s going to be getting his money. And Jacob says, well, I’m sure that’s not very much. He says, oh, it’s a sizable amount.   There’s 1,200,000 in an account. However, in order to release it, we need to settle up, I guess, this this other potential relative. There’s an aunt that he had named Genevieve Martin, and they need proof of her death. So everybody assumes that she died at this asylum because guess what? She was a patient there, I suppose, but they need confirmation of her death, and there never was a death certificate or something like that. 

Craig:  Which is stupid. It’s so dumb. Like, it’s, like, it’s it’s so convoluted and stupid. Like, that that wouldn’t happen. No. Right? Like, if if if if she was presumed dead and nobody knew where she was, like, oh, sorry. We’re just gonna hold this until there’s proof. And you’re responsible for providing that proof if you 

Clip:  want Todd many. Right. 

Craig:  Okay. Okay. Well then I’ll just run over to the hospital and get the records. Like, it’s it’s dumb, you know? But that’s I I guess that’s that’s the plan. Like, that’s what he’s gonna do. But before he does that, he goes to his dad’s house, and it’s like big fancy house. Super. And, you can tell that all of this is is set up for something, but it just it feels kinda clunky.   And and in talking about it, really, I’m being more critical than I was at the time because it all goes by very quickly. It’s not like they linger on it a long time or anything, but he goes to his dad’s house and he finds this weird box. Like, I couldn’t tell what it was. It looked like, obviously, some sort of memory box or something, but it had holes popped in the top of it for some reason, obviously, that we’ll find out later. And he opens it up, and he pulls out, like, a long ribbon. Don’t forget about that ribbon. He pulls out a ribbon, and then he he finds some pictures, presumably of, his aunt. And and there’s pictures of the aunt.   She’s this pretty blonde lady, and it seems like there’s also maybe pictures of a nurse or something. The lawyer had told him that his dad had, killed himself, by by slicing his throat with a straight razor. And Jacob, like, finds the razor, like, in a pool of blood. Like like, this was supposed to have happened, like, last week and, like, the blood is still fresh and, like, nobody cleaned this up or anything. 

Todd:  In the meantime, there are these creepy noises, like, happening around the house behind them that are supposed to be spooking us. And as he pulls up this razor and kind of looks in the mirror, and it’s that it’s that thing where he sees his own reflection, but he sees it as his father. You know, they’re sort sort of trying to draw some connection or something like that. Suddenly, a guy in a ski mask surprises him from behind. While he’s holding the razor 

Clip:  Holy shit. What the are you doing with that razor? 

Craig:  You scared 

Clip:  the shit out of me. What the 

Craig:  are you doing in a ski mask? 

Clip:  Look, I saw the lights on. Took a chance. Look, I was with you. Okay? Did you hear about my old man? Yeah, man. I’m sorry. Hey. Oh. Yo.   What? You scared a little straight? It’s 

Todd:  like what? There’s a guy in a ski mask behind you. But apparently, through the ski mask, he recognizes, you know, in a split second that it’s his friend. 

Craig:  Yeah. No. It doesn’t make any sense. In fact, what I got from this, it I I think that what we’re the way that I pieced it together is this guy was his friend, but this like, I’m stumbling over it because it’s it’s so ridiculous. Like, I think that Dell, this guy who’s played by Brandon t Jackson, handsome black guy, like, I think that he was really there to loot the house, but it just turns out that his friend happened to be there. So he was like, oh, well, since you’re here, I guess never mind. 

Todd:  Yeah. That’s another way to interpret 

Craig:  it. Well, right. And and and Jake and, like, Jacob almost thinks it’s funny. Like, Like, at one point, he asks him, like, hey, what time is it? And Del’s like, I don’t know. And and Jacob’s like, oh, really? You can’t check that watch you lifted from my dad’s house? He’s like, oh, well, I just picked that up. 

Clip:  Or you know, like Yeah. 

Todd:  He’s like, oh, 

Craig:  you can’t check that watch. Yeah. I just thought that it was hilarious that Jacob didn’t care at all that his quote, unquote friend was there to loot the house and and just kind of got thwarted. Silly, but whatever. Moving on. 

Todd:  And so they end up at a bar, and this is, again, so so convoluted. They end up at a bar, and so they’re sitting down, and there’s a bit of by play between Jacob and the bartender, who at first, I thought, oh, this is somebody he knew. He’s really super flirting with her. And he asked her for a drink called the last Todd. And Uh-huh. I thought that was, like, meaningful. Like, I’d like the last Todd, but it truly was a drink, I guess, he was asking for. And then she just hands him the drink menu and says, oh, that’s really funny and hands on the drink menu so that he can, you know, do something that she actually knows.   And she comes by and she gives him the drink and then she walks off and oh, okay. So as after this all kind of plays out, you realize, no. He was just flirting with her. They don’t really know each other. Am I right? I’m right about this. Right? 

Craig:  I have no idea. It was really unclear to me because they seem to have a familiarity. You know, it it seemed like we were gonna find out that they had some history, like maybe they had dated in the past and or or something. But No. And and they kind of seem to kind of remain familiar throughout, but there’s never anything to suggest that they knew each other. I don’t know. I don’t know if that was just the writing or I I I don’t know. I I I think you’re right.   I think that they don’t have a history, but it was it it remains unclear to me. 

Todd:  So as he’s sitting here, he’s talking with his friend and and his friend’s like, oh man, I’m in I’m in a whole bunch of trouble. And he’s like, well, how much trouble? It’s like 20 g’s trouble. It’s like 20 g’s. Oh man, That’s terrible. And he says, well, I might be able to help you out. And he says, well, you mean you have 20 g’s just lying around? And he says, no, but I have 1,200,000 I’m supposed to be getting, but I need this birth certificate or this death certificate. And if you can help me get it, you know, I guess I’ll share the money with you. At this point, I’m thinking, why does he think he needs any help getting this death Todd so he just needs to go get it.   So that’s as far as he knows, as far as anybody knows at this point, it’s as simple as him driving down there and getting this file. Now we’re also supposed to assume that this is, like, I guess, 1957 where people can’t just make phone calls or fax things or email things back and forth. He’s gotta physically go and pick this up. So anyway, he’s Sure. They have this deal. Okay. He’s gonna help him get the death certificate. So he drives, his bike to this place, and he goes in, and this is sure enough, it’s kind of a fully staffed office, but it’s clearly, pretty well dated in the technology that they’re using.   This woman’s, like, typing on a typewriter and stuff. And she goes and pulls the file out for his aunt, hands it to him. He looks through it and the car is about ready to leave, but then he sees that the one thing that’s missing from the file is the death certificate. It says it was remitted to the annex. So he goes back in and he’s like, what’s this mean? And the woman says, oh oh yeah yeah, the death certificate’s like in our annex. It’s like our top secret, super secret files, that are closed to the public, and it would need a court order in order to get this out. And he says, well, how long would that take? Oh, 5 or 6 months if we’re lucky. And, again Right.   I was thinking back too to the to the what the lawyer had said to him earlier, and the lawyer had suggested that without the deaths without the certificate, it would take him about 5 or 6 months, right, to get the money because they’d have 

Craig:  to go 

Todd:  through some other process. So right now, at this point in the story, he’s facing a potential 5 or 6 months to legitimately, either way, get this 1,200,000. Right? So Yeah. 

Craig:  Like Which which for 1 or which for 1 or $2,000,000 doesn’t really seem like that long to wait. 

Clip:  No. It doesn’t really. Like, what’s the point? 

Todd:  Okay. Alright. We’ll sit on it. We’ll go through the process. So 

Craig:  Right. I I was just gonna say I didn’t want you to skip by this too quickly because, like, I feel like this movie leaves a lot of loose ends that I I just didn’t understand because after Jacob asks this, I don’t know, receptionist lady all about this stuff, and she she gives him the info. Then as he tries as he leaves, she’s like, oh, wait a second, but he doesn’t, and he goes. And she’s filling out forms, and it looks like she’s filling out an admissions form for Jacob. Yeah. And, you know, she she she fills in his name and then, like, next to, you know, what is he suffering from or whatever, she said she fills in acute claustrophobia, which we’ve not heard anything about. It it comes up again later. But, like, it’s bizarre.   That never really comes up again, and it never really is explained. Like, is this whole hospital somehow supernaturally influenced? Like, are even the living people who are still working there, like, somehow I don’t know. It’s bizarre. It doesn’t really make any sense. 

Todd:  Yeah. 

Clip:  And and 

Craig:  then you’re right. He runs into this guy who, in the IMDB credits, is just credited as the raggedy man. And and they just have this, like, little encounter, like, he backs up his car and I think he hits the guy’s cart or something, like, shopping cart. And then he just, like, he talks to the guy briefly, and that’s just it. And I’m thinking, well, this guy’s gonna come back around. It’s gonna be significant in some way. And the guy does show up again later, but just for a second, and like it’s not explained. Like I don’t And Todd, you know, as we talk about it and we’re being kinda down on it, And and, you know, as we talk about it and we’re being kinda down on it, you know, we’re making it sound terrible.   And I I it’s not terrible. It it’s it’s very much on par with the kind of direct to video stuff you see. 

Clip:  Yeah. 

Craig:  You know, the kind of stuff that pops up on Netflix that you’ve never heard of or the kind of stuff that pops up at the red box that you’ve never heard of. And and in that genre, you know, of those low budget movies that you’ve never heard of that you just pick because there’s literally nothing else, Mhmm. Within that genre, it’s actually pretty good. Like, the quality is pretty good compared to other movies of that type. 

Todd:  Yes. 

Craig:  Other low budget movies. So so folks, if you’re getting a really negative impression, I I I kinda wanna dispel that a little bit because it’s not awful. You know, I didn’t feel like I had wasted my time watching it, but be aware going in that it’s it’s certainly not a perfect movie, and and there are gonna be questions left hanging that are not gonna be answered for you. 

Clip:  Yeah. 

Craig:  Yeah. And if that’s something that really bothers you, then maybe avoid this movie. 

Todd:  Yeah. And that’s part of it. You know, it’s we’re we’re talking about it retrospectively. When you’re watching the movie, you know, these questions are being raised and you think, oh, okay. They’re building some suspense. Clearly, this is gonna be in something. Clearly, this is gonna be in something. Oh, what is this? I expect to to have that figured out by the end of the movie, But you’re right, those loose ends just kind of end up dangling.   And so the things that you at at first attribute to mystery and suspense turn out by the end of the film to like. 

Craig:  Yeah. This is like red herrings. 

Todd:  Yeah. 

Craig:  It’s it’s Yeah. So but anyway, so so Jacob goes back to Dell and says, oh, I couldn’t get it or whatever. And Dell says, well, I’ve been doing some research, and there’s this guy online, named named Scott who’s super into Eloise. And as luck would have it, he lives in our hometown, so we just gotta run over to his house. 

Todd:  Yeah. And and that’s that scene is so funny because it’s so contrived. I mean, first of all, the 2 of them are sitting in in this man it’s a mansion of a house. Like, this is this is like Bruce Wayne’s banner is what the interior of this place looks like. And they’re sitting by a fireplace, and they’re obviously having a couple drinks. And it’s at this point in the I mean, you imagine that he called him up. He said, hey. Let’s go over.   Let’s meet at my house. They go in. They sit down. They pour some drinks. It’s nighttime. They’re chatting. And the whole reason for them to get together and talk, suddenly now they’re talking about it. You know? Right.   He didn’t just call him up and say, hey, dude. I couldn’t get the I couldn’t get the things. He says, so did you get the stuff? And he says, no. I didn’t. 

Clip:  Mhmm. So we’re waiting on. Look. People break in that place all the time just for fun. Yeah. But how are we gonna find the 

Craig:  an annex? 

Clip:  Of all places. That man got me crazy. I’ve been doing some research. Check this out. 

Todd:  And, again, the fact that Dell has done research on this place is totally unnecessary because as far as Dell and anybody knows, all that Jacob had to do was drive to the office and get the certificate. 

Craig:  That’s right. 

Todd:  So there’d be no reason for him to have done all this research. But anyway, he does. And at this point, I’m looking at the mansion around, and I’m thinking, alright. What is the rush? Okay. I guess maybe it it’s because you’re trying to help your friend out, but I thought, surely, you don’t really want this house anymore. I figured by the time you sell it, you’re gonna have a lot more than $20 in your bank account that you can hand over to your friend while you wait for that 1,200,000. But, you know, anyway, it it gets us moving in the store. 

Craig:  Yeah. It does. I mean and and, you know, when Dell says says he’s done this research, like, he’s pulling up things on the Internet and, like, there’s video, and it I’m not really sure how there would be video of this stuff if it was really that long ago, but whatever. But it shows, doctor Grice talking about his methods, and his methods are what they call confrontational therapy, which I have no idea if that’s a real thing or not. But basically, what it comes down to is forcing people to face their fears. And by that, what they mean is, okay. So if you’re afraid of spiders, we’re gonna put a lot of spiders on you. Or if you’re afraid of, you know, whatever it is, that you’re afraid of, we’re gonna make you confront that and that’s supposedly going to cure you.   Of course, it all just looks very sadistic and terrible. And medical practice at that time, we look back and some of it does seem sadistic and terrible. I don’t know. I assume these people had their patients’ best interests in mind, but I I don’t think that that’s what we’re supposed to think here. I think we’re supposed to think that this doctor, doctor Grice, is really just kind of a sadistic guy who wants to torture people, and and so that kinda sets us up for some stuff later too. Yep. But they they go to this expert’s house because, you know, he’s just down the street. And, the guy’s name is Scott, and he’s this young guy played by an actor named PJ Byrne.   I didn’t recognize him from anything, but it becomes clear very early on that he is in some way, I don’t know. It seems like he’s on the spectrum, like he’s autistic or has Asperger’s or something along those lines. And so they’re talking to him, and Scott is all excited because he wants to go, and he’s got, like, schematics for the for the buildings and stuff, so they’re gonna be able to find it. And then as luck would have it, Pia, the bartender shows up, and it turns out that she is Scott’s sister. And also coincidentally, it turns out that Pia and Scott’s mom was a nurse, at Eloise, and she just mysteriously left for work one day and never came home. And Pia says something like, so I was basically left to raise my brother. Now what we see later is that when the mother dies, Pia couldn’t have been more than, like, 6. So are we supposed to believe that 6 year old Pia raised her autistic brother? Like, 

Todd:  what’s his brother Okay. What’s her brother even born then? Because she seems older than him. Yeah. What? It’s it’s yeah. It’s pretty hilarious. I I also like the fact that they also feel the need to break into Scott’s house. Like, they what did they knock on the door, or was the door open and they’re they’re going through it before they he surprises them? 

Craig:  No. I don’t know. 

Clip:  You know what I’m talking about? There’s that whole 

Todd:  bit where their Your house 

Clip:  is as good as mine. 

Todd:  They’re prowling around in the dark in his house and they’re seeing all this creepy equipment. You know, it’s like, again, they don’t flip on a light or anything, but they’ve got their flashlights and there’s like, oh, there’s some stuff in jars. Oh, here’s this creepy medical equipment. What’s going on? And then Scott, like, has been hiding in the corner this whole time and, like, flips on a light behind a, like, a mannequin or something in a wheelchair and, like like, he planned this surprise for them. It was again, it was just another another odd setup for one of those pretty standard go through the creepy house and then be surprised kinda moments, you know. 

Craig:  Well, it’s just like let’s create tension here just because, like it’s not really necessary like they could have just knocked on the door, but instead let’s have people creeping around in the shadows. And another thing, you know, again, we talked about how it seems like Jacob and Pia had history. And, like, it almost feels like that here too because when Pia comes in and she’s like, what are you doing? Why are you talking to my brother? And blah blah blah. And Dell kind of says, oh, we just need him to take us to the hospital. And she’s like, oh, no. Absolutely not. And and Jacob’s like, okay. Just a second.   And he takes her out in the hallway, and he’s like, but I really need to get in there. And she’s like, okay. Alright. I guess if you really need to It’s a 

Todd:  planned period assessment. Yeah. 

Craig:  But but nothing better happened to him, and I’m gonna come along to make sure nothing happens. Like, she just she just gives in immediately. It’s kinda silly. And so they go. I mean and and I guess that’s one good thing about the movie is that it keeps moving. You know, it’s it’s not boring. It’s not slow. It does keep moving.   As unrealistic as that may be, The action keeps going, and I do appreciate that. 

Todd:  But also by this point, we kind of know what’s gonna happen. We’ve got all the characters that we heard about before. Altogether, and we know that Jacob’s gonna be missing. Dell’s gonna be dead. Scott’s gonna be dead, and Pia’s gonna be in the mental or wherever, you know, answering questions. So it’s also like a little, you know? And if there were a a point by the end of the movie for revealing all that early on, it it would have been okay. But as it turns out, it’s just what happens. 

Craig:  So Right. And and and so they they go right away. And I don’t even remember what the context of this is, but, like, it’s one of those things where in literature, you would just call it total crap because it’s so obvious. Like, when when 

Todd:  when That’s a technical term, teacher, man. 

Craig:  Exactly. Total crap. Because when foreshadowing is so obvious, like, it’s not even really foreshadowing, you know, like, you shouldn’t be able to figure out what’s going to happen immediately. That that removes all sense of mystery. And, I I I feel like as as they’re walking to this place and they get there right away and they’re just walking around outside, I feel like maybe they have to go inside somewhere that’s dark and and and Jacob is uncomfortable 

Clip:  going in there. And it You okay? Yeah. Hi, just a little class of COVID. 

Craig:  You know, no big deal. 

Clip:  Everybody’s afraid of something. I don’t do needles. Oh, I wouldn’t say afraid necessarily. I’m like, oh, well, 

Craig:  then I’m sure claustrophobia and needles will never come up in this movie about conversion therapy. Exactly. 

Todd:  That is exactly what 

Craig:  we do. Me in there. Oh, gosh. Yeah. And and once they get in there, then if you’ve seen a haunted insane asylum movie, you’ve seen it for 

Clip:  a year on pretty much. You really have because 

Todd:  I don’t know. It’s not even as exciting as one of those because it never 

Clip:  Yeah. 

Todd:  Every scene that kinda hap I never got chills, like, once in this movie. I never Not no. 

Craig:  Not really. 

Todd:  And I was watching the dark in an apartment, not at work on you on YouTube at my desk. Yeah. But, like, you know, they’re going through the the insane asylum and, you know, this was filmed on location in Eloise, and I thought that was cool. I knew it in advance. 

Craig:  Me too. 

Todd:  But honestly, they could have been anywhere because it’s so dark and they’re just shining lights around. You’re just seeing staircases and occasional flashes of wall and stuff. And Scott has this one of these things. I actually kinda like the character of Scott, and I love that scene Me too. Where they were introduced to him because he’s, like, flipping off the walls like a giddy schoolboy about going in there, and he’s running around the room, and he’s, like 

Clip:  and and they used the first x-ray was developed there, 

Todd:  and he, like, pulls an x-ray off the shelf, and he’s, like, oh, yeah. 

Clip:  And then they used to experiment with 

Todd:  this, and he’d go over and, like, get a tool off, and and it’s, like, they’re all they’re all looking at each other like this guy is crazy. I can’t believe we’re going along with them. And it reminded me a lot of the original Independence Day. You remember the guy who’s, like, super on u f about UFOs? Yeah. Yeah. The guy who played data or whatever, and he’s just like so giddy and excited that all of this stuff that he had been learning and all these conspiracy theories and stuff that he’d been figuring out over the years are finally coming you know, to life and becoming useful. And so, like, that was really neat about Scott, and he’s got this phone, a cell phone with a camera in it that he said he removed the UV filter from it so that the phone only shoots UV, which is total BS. It shoots, like, everything and also UV, if you remove the UV filter from it.   But, anyway Yeah. 

Craig:  It’s dumb. Basically, he’s trying to he he’s trying to justify the fact that we’re gonna see him using this infrared camera on his, like, Nokia. 

Clip:  Oh my god. That’s right. 

Craig:  And and this, you know, the the whole I I guess there’s, like 20 minutes when they’re in there just, like, looking around and, like, they find spooky pictures of the patients and, they they find all this weird stuff like babies in formaldehyde in jars, and, they find this place where apparently they’ve kept, all of the ashes from the crematorium. And, Scott spills one of the jars of ashes, and it, like, smokes mysteriously. Like, I don’t know if we’re supposed to think that that, like, unlocked something. 

Clip:  I know. I was, like, 

Todd:  I was thinking sorority babes in the slime ball bowl o rama. So does that Oh, yeah. I was like, oh, no. Totally. Over the the bowling trophy of the insane asylum. You know? 

Clip:  He he let 

Todd:  his spirit loose. But it’s really not clear, like, at the end of the day if that had any significance because there’s so many of these little things that just kinda happen that that are just in there. Right. And even his camera, like barely, like he’s running around with it and he is holding it up and you kinda see images. And then a little later on as he’s holding it up more and more in a room, he’s seeing more. It looks like I mean, if you were looking at this camera, you’d be freaking out because you see movement of figures in front of you that are clearly not there. Yet he’s just like excited about it. Right? He’s just like, oh, like he’s moving it around like, oh, I can see the ghosts.   I can see the ghosts. 

Craig:  But he doesn’t say anything to anybody. No. Like he just kind of giggles excitedly so nobody else knows what’s going on. And like they’re walking along in the hospital and just weird things are happening like, a a security monitor comes on as they walk by it. Of course, they don’t see it. But, like, when the security monitor comes on, it looks like things are happening around them as though it’s ghostly stuff or stuff that happened in the past and and like we’re seeing it through the monitor. And it is spooky And and I I have to say there was at one point, like, Dell drops the watch that he stole from Jacob’s dad, and when he drops the watch, I don’t know if, like, the watch breaks, but it looks like time Todd, and then there’s a flashback, and we see, you know, it’s it’s either black and white or like sepia tones or something, and and we see orderlies beating up a guy, and then, the the guy in the flashback or whatever it is grabs the watch, so it’s like these different time periods are existing concurrently, or or maybe it’s just all haunting stuff. It it was a little reminiscent to me of the remake of 13 Ghosts.   And and while I don’t think that’s a great movie by any stretch of the imagination, I actually mean that as a compliment. Like, it was kinda it was spooky and it was kind of cool stuff going on, but without any explanation, without, you know, we don’t know, is this place haunted all the time? Is it haunted on just this particular day because Scott knocked over the ashes? What they’re looking for, of course, are those files, and there’s lots of scenes of them just going through files, which is real exciting. But eventually eventually, they find it, which again is absolutely impossible. You know? Like, this is just this horribly rundown place with, like, millions of file cabinets and but eventually they find it. And when they pull it out, they’re like, oh, here it is. They find the death certificate and they’re like So 

Clip:  she died May 5th? Yeah. Yeah. It’s 30 years ago. 

Craig:  To the day. 

Todd:  Exactly. And it’s it’s the Indiana it’s the Indiana Jones Arc storage, warehouse of record rooms that they have. I mean, it is literally like a giant warehouse with filing cabinets in it. And and, of course, it’s in this completely abandoned building, and then everything’s in complete disarray. And I’m looking at it, and I’m thinking, these are the top secret sealed documents that should be 

Craig:  No wonder you need a court order to get them. Like 

Todd:  It’s probably just 

Craig:  for safety reasons. 6 months to find 

Clip:  it. Right? 

Todd:  Oh my god. Yeah. It’s pretty silly. And you’re right. And and while they’re looking at records and people are looking at records, everybody’s just like Scottie wanders off. And so she starts looking for him, and it’s just a whole big excuse for them to waste a lot of time. It it it ceases to become about looking for the records except for Jacob. And everybody else is just just wandering around either exploring or looking for someone else.   Or, oh, I heard something. What was that? 

Craig:  Well, I mean, it it makes a little bit of sense, I suppose, because Scott is so interested in the history, and so it makes and, you know, he his mind wanders. So it makes sense that he would be kind of exploring. That’s fine. And Dell, we know he’s a crook, so it kinda makes sense that he would be looting, which is basically what he does. 

Todd:  I guess that makes sense. 

Craig:  Yeah. And and Scott, eventually, he kinda sees a, you know, a ghost or apparition through his little camera, and he he finds a picture of himself, and it appear it looks like a picture of him being lobotomized. And then he turns around, and there’s, like, this ghost orderly, and he gets scared. And he, like, backs up, and then he falls through the floor, like, down several stories through the floor onto a gurney. And then there are these I don’t wanna say spectral because it’s not like they look like ghosts. You know? It’s just actors. You know? But apparently, I guess he has fallen 

Clip:  Through time. 

Craig:  Back in time. Yeah. Right? Or or or it you know, into this spectral realm, and they take him into this room, and they lobotomize him. The the doctor, the bad doctor, doctor Grice, does a frontal lobotomy. And that’s it. Like, Scott’s dead now. 

Todd:  It’s honestly not even that scary. I don’t know. I guess it’s just because, again, it’s like he’s fallen through time. And so here he is. He’s pushed into the room. They do this phlebotomy on him. And I guess at some point, he dropped his phone camera, infrared camera thing. And as he’s being lobotomized, we’re seeing images in the camera and the last image is okay.   You know, he gets it pounded through his eye or whatever and an orderly or whoever it is, you know, attending to the surgery yanks it out of his eye. But then we see the same scene through the camera and it’s just Scott. It’s it looks like Scott pulling it out of his own eye. Like he himself, like, lobotomized himself, like he was, you know, having these delusions or whatever, the ghosts and whatnot were in his mind. But in the at the end of the day, the only person in the room was actually him. But that also doesn’t make any sense because the camera’s supposed to show ghosts. It’s not supposed to show the absence of ghosts. So I was kind of confused.   I was thinking, oh, is this happening in his mind and there are no ghosts there and that’s what it’s trying to tell us? 

Craig:  Yeah. And as it turns out, that doesn’t appear to be the case. You know, it appears to be the case that the, you know, physically manipulate their environment. Yeah. It’s clunky. But it like you said, in the moment, you just don’t care. Like, you just kinda go along with it. Whatever.   Okay. You know, what’s gonna happen next? And what happens next is, Del is looting basically and he kind of finds a nurse’s station or something and he finds a medicine cabinet, but he has to break the glass to get into the medicine cabinet. And he does and he’s pulling out all the medicine, but then he realizes that he’s cut his hand pretty badly, in breaking the cabinet. And so I guess he thinks that whatever medicine is in the cabinet must be an antiseptic. 

Todd:  Without reading it. You’re right. 

Craig:  So he just pours this jar onto his hand and and then the camera, closes up on it, and it’s LSD. 

Todd:  It’s it’s a it’s a jar of lick of LSD, and he just pours it on his hand. 

Craig:  Which would be probably, like, 100 of doses Oh my Todd. That he’s pouring into a flesh wound. And, so then he goes, okay. So Pia and, Jacob have found the records. They wanna get out of there. They’re looking around. They can’t find Scott. They’re looking for Scott.   They eventually find Dell. And Dell’s there and it only takes a few seconds before he starts to freak out. And again, it’s the whole, you know, is he is Dell now seeing ghosts because he’s tripping on LSD or the ghosts really there? Who knows? Who cares? But he starts seeing ghosts and he freaks out and he pulls out a gun and just starts shooting haphazardly everywhere. And, he takes off running. Pia and Jacob, run off trying to find him, but they can’t find him, and Dell ends up in this room. And I don’t even remember how this happens. The room floods. 

Clip:  Oh my god. 

Craig:  Oh god. I’ve somehow 

Todd:  I don’t know. Will he see he stumbles across a giant glowing cross or or or and a bunch of people like inmates and we’re seeing visions. And all of this that we’ve been talking about with Dell and everything that we talked about with, with, Scotty has actually been happening concurrently. Like, it’s been cutting between these two things. And so we’re an hour into the movie, and it feels like we’ve had nothing but build up to this point. Like, I was waiting for, you know, the ax to fall, and it just took so long. It took so long for delta for for Scotty to finally get lobotomized and for Del to finally drown in this flooding room which was totally unclear. You feel like you’re getting built up, like you you still even when these two deaths happen, you still don’t know exactly what’s going on, and we’re already like an hour into the movie and we don’t have a clear sense, you know, of, of what we’re looking out for.   You know what I mean? Yeah. 

Craig:  And and and I feel like it it’s at this point that it really kind of takes a turn and it just becomes full on supernatural. Pia and Jacob find Scottie, and Pia freaks out for a second. And and and then they then they just try to run away, and they, you know, all of a sudden, it’s like they’re thrust into the past. And all of these, orderlies and nurses and patients are around and, like, they witness, you know, something going on, like, in a day room. And I I couldn’t even really understand what was going on. Like, it’s like the orderlies and nurses were, like, dancing with the patients, and some of the patients were, like, nude or semi nude. And and and And that They’re like I That 

Todd:  scene is hilarious because it goes on forever. Like, the camera swings dramatically around the 2 of them as they’re all, like, back to back looking around the room, and the room is turned sepia Todd, and around them, there’s all this, you know, And, like, every stereotype that you could imagine of an inmate in an asylum. Bad teeth, crazy laughter, drawing weird paintings and pictures, missing limbs and deformed arms. Any one of these things is happening all around them. And it keeps switching between all these images and this camera continually whipping around them. And, Jacob’s, like, rubbing his eyes, like, what? And then it’s, like, goes back to 

Clip:  the guy painting creepy painting. And then we’re back 

Todd:  to him rubbing his eyes again going, what? Am I really seeing this? And he goes back and forth, like, 6 times. And I’m like, man, this scene has gone on for, like, 5 minutes. 

Craig:  And, ultimately, you know, it was just to kind of, I guess, show us the horrors of what was going on in the asylum. And and once they’ve witnessed it wide eyed for 5 minutes, they run outside. And we had seen earlier that, like, there were guards or cops patrolling or something. Like, they had had to hide at one point when they first got in there. And so Pia runs out. I feel like Jacob for some reason gets caught up inside there, but Pia runs out and there’s and when she runs out, she runs out into real time. And it’s raining and there’s a cop outside and she says, My friend’s in there. Can you please go get him? And, the cop runs inside and then all of a sudden, the rain stops and it flips back into old timey again.   And a cop comes out with Jacob, I think, and they end up being sat in the cop car for a little while before they end up going back in. And I’m sure there’s more to it than that. I don’t remember. It’s not really important. They get back in there, and this is where pieces start to fall into place, I guess. They end up in this, like, surgical theater. Pia is strapped down in there, and, doctor Geiss is talking about the conversion therapy. 

Clip:  We had 2 interesting case studies today. This patient suffers from an acute form of claustrophobia. The most severe and frightening of which is specifically the fear of waking up and discovering that you’re buried alive. So when his anesthesia wears off, he’ll find himself in a morgue drawer, forcing him to face his ultimate fear. Perhaps you’re wondering why he’s gagged. Well, when he comes to, we wouldn’t want him to wake the dead. 

Craig:  Pia is afraid of needles, so I’m gonna let the nurse take over because I’ve got an important birth to deal with. And then there’s a terribly disgusting scene of Pia just being stabbed repeatedly with these huge needles. And I say stabbed, they’re stabbing her in the arm, but it’s gross. Like, I I I guess I have to give it some, credit for the effects here because I was cringing at this point. I don’t like needles either. Oh, yeah. 

Clip:  And, you 

Craig:  know, they’re just they’re stabbing these huge needles into her arm, and and it looks pretty real. It’s it’s pretty good. 

Todd:  You know, it looks like this might be a scene an actual scene from the past that they’re reliving because it it occasionally goes up to the, you know, the students who are up in the theater watching this, and they’re 1 by 1 kind of getting up and walking out disgusted. 

Clip:  Right. 

Todd:  Like like, this was maybe an actual demonstration. And so I was thinking, again, at this point, it you say it becomes totally supernatural. I felt like the movie became like a time travel movie 

Craig:  because Yeah. It’s weird. 

Todd:  The it’s it’s not like it’s going back and forth between these flashbacks and the real world at this point. It’s all flashback supernatural that they’re in, and she manages to escape. She ends up yanking her restraints out of the chair, grabs a needle, stabs a nurse, pushes another one down, and runs out. And then so so we’re in this, right, the supernatural world, that ghostly world that they’re supposed to be in. And she, like, is in the hallway of this asylum, and they’re it’s really busy. There are people going back and forth, and she grabs a nurse’s uniform and goes into the toilet and changes, and now she’s able to sneak around the ghosts by being dressed as a nurse and acting normal. 

Craig:  Mhmm. 

Todd:  It’s just tonally, it it just totally changes to this, like, sneaky heist kind of movie. 

Craig:  Yep. Yep. And and the thing that I was thinking about, you know, like, she’s running around. She’s dressed as the nurse, whatever. Eventually, she gets Jacob out of the morgue, and they’re both kind of running around observing what’s happening, and we see some important things. But the whole time, I was thinking, oh, so I guess she’s just fine now after, like, beating the needles. Totally brutalized with the she’s fine. She’s over it.   Like, her arms are cool. She can push her on a wheelchair. No big deal. But okay. So so now they’re they’re both out, and they’re just kind of observing what’s going on. They see, Jacob’s aunt, or she’s, like, in a a delivery room. And that was another thing. Like, they had said earlier that Pia’s mom had worked in the nursery, and I’m like, why do they need a nursery in an insane asylum? Like, this doesn’t even make sense.   Now historically, the real Eloise was originally a poor house, and then it became an asylum, and then it was also a hospital. So I guess fine in the hospital part, they had a nursery or whatever. Mhmm. But, this woman is, giving birth, and we know that it’s Jacob’s aunt because we’ve seen her before, 

Clip:  Oh, look 

Craig:  at all the pieces falling falling together. Mhmm. And then this nurse who we’ve seen in pictures, we know is Pia’s mom. Oh, look at all the pieces falling falling together. 

Todd:  Could be 

Craig:  immediately. Goes in there. And at that point, like, I I feel like Jacob just figures this out somehow easily that this woman was not really his aunt. It was really his mother, and he had been born in there. And, like, he goes in and has a heartwarming moment with her before she dies, but then as the nurse is coming in, like, he slips under the bed or something. And, the the nurse I feel like Pia’s mom or no, excuse me. Jacob’s mom whispers something to Pia’s mom, and then Pia’s mom says, don’t worry, Jen. This is one baby who won’t grow up in this place.   I don’t care who his father is. I’ll call your brother right now. And then she leaves, and we see that Jacob’s under the bed, and we see that Genevieve is bleeding out, and blood drips through the mattress because, you know, why wouldn’t it? So much blood. Into Jacob’s mouth. 

Todd:  Did did you notice that 

Craig:  that the blood dripped into his mouth? Doctor. 

Clip:  Well, I’ll tell you 

Todd:  I’ll tell you what I noticed was that this guy who’s claustrophobic seem to have no problem hiding under the bed. 

Craig:  Oh, Todd. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So then, Genevieve dies and the nurse puts the baby in this box. Oh, we’ve seen this box before. It’s the box from earlier on. And she she pokes holes in the box before she puts them in there and she puts the baby in there and she she, Pia apparently had been at work with her mom that day.   The brother Scott had said, sometimes mom took you to work. Okay? So we remember that. And, so she puts the baby in this box and she she takes the hair bow out of Pia’s hair. Remember? Told you, ribbon, important. And she, ties up the box and she gives it to Pia and she says, There’s gonna be a man outside waiting. Take this box out to him. Adult Jacob and Pia, I I I don’t know why, but Jacob decides that he needs to start the fire, the fire that that that took down Eloise. And so he starts it and they they try to run out and Pia gets out and Pia sees herself as a young child give the box to Jacob’s dad.   But for whatever reason, Jacob gets grabbed by an orderly and pulled back in. And then immediately, it pops back into the present. And there are real life, you know, real time firefighters there and real time cops there, and Pia’s like, my friend’s still in there. You gotta go in him. She go get him. She tries to run back in, but they won’t, let her in. And then we cut back to the bookend. 

Todd:  Mhmm. And here we are. 

Craig:  And here we are. And 

Todd:  and that’s it. I mean, the the bookend doesn’t tell you anything. The detective just throws his arms up in the air and says, what really happened to Jacob in that fire yesterday? She doesn’t respond. He’s like, alright. He he leaves the room. She opens up the box, and she goes through the photos, flicks through flicks through a bunch of drawings of all of them Yeah. And I’m not sure where those came from. 

Craig:  I’m not either. Why would there have been drawings of them in that box or in that file? Like like, the Genevieve, the mom had been, like, psychic and had had had sketched them all, you know, back in her day. 

Todd:  I feel like it was supposed to be like some because we saw a drawing similar to that when in during that weird scene where they were, you know, the room was spinning around them and they saw all the, crazy people drawing and painting it. But, again, it it would be way too supernatural for, you know, something like that to be there now in this scene. It it just it it it would have more significance, and she’s just kinda tossing them in the box as she’s as we’re hearing the voices of previous dialogue that was said in the movie as though it were significant, and it’s really not. And then we get a a a closing shot, basically, of Jacob who’s back. Apparently, when he was pulled into the building, he was pulled, you know, back into the past, and he’s back in his morgue spot, you know, screaming in his box. And the doctor, is back in his asylum, and a nurse comes by with a certificate. Is it an an it’s like a death certificate or something? 

Craig:  I think it’s a birth certificate. 

Todd:  But oh, yeah. It’s got his name on it, Jacob’s name on it, and the doctor circles born alive but now dead. 

Craig:  Right. 

Todd:  And he hands it back to her, and she smiles, and he walks up the stairs, and then we get then we get, this film is dedicated to the memory of Eloise’s former patients, their their families, and the staff of Eloise. This 

Craig:  Isn’t that nice? 

Todd:  This heartwarming tale is dedicated to all the wonderful people who made this happen. 

Clip:  Like, what? And then 

Craig:  and then I’m sure that the I’m sure that the families are are very thankful. 

Clip:  I’m sure they are, 

Todd:  especially when you wait through the credits. Did you wait through the credits? No. At the very end, I kid you not, at the very end, there’s a notice. It’s back where it says no animals were harmed, you know, in the making of this picture. That far end of the credits, it says, during the operation of the Eloise Hospital complex as a sanitarium and hospital, it was considered one of the foremost treatment centers in the world. It was well known and respected for its ethical and charitable treatments of its residents. While Eloise is an actual place, the events and characters that were portrayed in this picture are fictional. The producers acknowledge that this fictional storyline does not reflect any method of treatment or care that was provided by the faculty during the time that it was operating as a functioning sanatorium or hospital. 

Craig:  So That’s hilarious. What a lovely tribute. 

Todd:  As a tribute to the hardworking staff of this well respected institution, we made up a bullshit story about a doctor who terrorized and mutilated patients. 

Craig:  Oh, gosh. That’s funny. 

Todd:  Oh, my gosh. 

Craig:  Oh, it’s funny. I have had a really good time goofing on this movie with you. I really have. It’s been a lot of fun. It’s been some good laughs. But honestly, folks, the movie 

Todd:  It’s terrible. 

Craig:  Has a relatively low budget horror movie. It’s not that bad, you know? I I didn’t I I don’t regret watching it, you know? It it it held my interest for the hour and a half. The acting was not bad at all. It was actually pretty good. The the the cinematography was okay, pretty Todd, some decent effects, some interesting things going on. It I have a feeling that it didn’t look or feel as cheap as it probably actually was. And so I have to give it some credit for that. 

Todd:  Yeah. I’m with you on that too. We’ve seen so much worse, and, it’s Oh, yeah. It it it the the worst thing you could say about it is it’s kinda pedestrian. 

Craig:  Sure. 

Todd:  The except for the fact that Eloise just had clearly had a lot of great material to mind. I mean, what a fantastic location and a great hospital history. Yeah. Even if it was a whole total bullshit story about it. 

Craig:  Right. Right. 

Todd:  It’s kind of a letdown in that way, you know, that it ended up being kinda what it was. But I enjoyed watching it Todd, and I didn’t walk out of it really angry or upset. It just it just felt like kind of a clunky mess. 

Craig:  Yeah. And and really, if anything, it piqued my interest in the actual history. Like, I’m I’m legitimately interested in going and reading more about this place because it just seems like such a fascinating place. So I don’t know. Let’s go, Craig. Todd trip. 

Clip:  Right. I would go. 

Craig:  I would totally check it out. I think it would be neat because I I guess there’s only, like, 1 or 2 buildings that still stand, but they’re still operational. Now they’re not hospitals or anything anymore. They’ve housed businesses and, like, law offices and things. But, there’s a couple of the original buildings still standing where they filmed this, and I guess the ruins of some of the buildings are still there too. And, it it would be kind of a cool place if you happened to be in Michigan and happened to be in that area. You know, such a such a big place obviously affected a lot of people, a lot of history there. That’s interesting.   So I at least appreciate the movie for bringing that into my consciousness, and I probably will, look into it a little bit more. Don’t worry, I won’t bore you with it. But but, for me, I took that away from it. I I did not like the movie. I didn’t love it. I didn’t think it was great. I I thought it was fine. You know? It was entertaining.   Lots of loose ends, lots of plot holes, but, not boring, quick paced. Horror fans, I I would recommend it. You you’re looking for something to watch on a Saturday night, you can’t find something else, go to the red box, pick up Eloise. I I don’t think that you’ll be terribly disappointed. 

Todd:  Yeah. But, I mean, were you ever scared? I mean, was was No. No. Remotely scary about this to you? The needles 

Craig:  The needles were freaky. 

Todd:  That was freaky. Yeah. And especially if you don’t have a thing for needles, that would scare the heck out of you. Who has 

Craig:  the thing for needles? 

Clip:  That’s true. 

Todd:  Who who wants some people? 

Clip:  Stabbed you really. I guess. 

Todd:  I I’ll say one thing, you know, it it it kind of fell short of some interesting directions that coulda gone in that I thought by the end of the movie that they were trying to imply somehow that these characters had a role in their own history. 

Clip:  Yeah. 

Todd:  At the point which it he is the one who started that fire in 1980, you know. Yep. He has that moment with his mother. You can almost imagine his mother, you know, seeing him as a ghost and but that wouldn’t make any and and then even when the doctor, you know, signs that certificate saying, but now dead, but it it doesn’t. I mean, it can’t it can’t be that way because that would then mean that Jacob now doesn’t exist. You know, it’s it would it would have to be one of these weird paradoxes that wouldn’t play out. Right. You know, in the in the in the bookend where she’s, PS, still knows about Jacob and all that.   So that was 

Craig:  Right. And and because the movie is so new and I think it’s going to end up being so obscure, we’ll probably never know what the original intentions are. I I I think that you’re right that that that is interesting and you could read that in that they had some impact on their own history. And maybe there was more of that intended and and for whatever reason, it just and we’ll probably never know, sadly. 

Todd:  The secrets of Eloise are gonna remain locked up forever. 

Craig:  The secrets of Eloese. Yeah. I I do think that there was some potential that was not fully utilized, but, I didn’t hate it. It it was it was what it was, and it was fine, and it was entertaining at work for an hour and a half when I had nothing else to do. And, so if you’re if you ever find yourself at work High pin LOE. High praise 

Todd:  from 2 guys in a chainsaw. That’s right. Well, thank you again for listening to another episode. If you enjoyed it, please share it with a friend. You can find us on iTunes, Stitcher, or Google Play. You can also find us on Facebook where we encourage you to let us know what you thought of this film, what you thought of our assessment of it, and, also, let us know what other movies you’d like us to see. We do requests fairly often on this show. Until next time.   I’m Todd 

Craig:  And I’m Craig. 

Todd:  With 2 Guys and a Chainsaw.

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